The weight loss journey for most people is filled with struggles. Unless of course you are one of the lucky few that hits your goal without ever gaining a pound! I am not one of those people. (Insert sarcastic comment here...)! I started out at almost 400 pounds. By the time I actually hit my goal weight of 150, i will have lost over 225 pounds. Yes, that makes me obese. And yes, i am still obese. Struggling sucks. It's like you get in this groove and then you stumble and fall. I think the trick is to get back up and start walking again. That is the trick that most of us really need to learn.
In 2008 I got down to my lowest weight of 252.8 pounds. And then came my first fall. It is a little weird for me to say this, but before I knew it, I started to gain weight. I received an award in my TOPS club that year. I was the Division 1, 2nd place winner for the state of Oregon. By the time the state recognition days came around in April of 2009, I found myself up 20 pounds. I had to struggle to lose enough to go on stage and accept my award. I managed to do it by the skin of my teeth. As soon as the recognition days were over, however, I just kept going up. I was not eating right and I was not exercising. By the time Christmas came around in 2009, I was back up to 303 pounds. I had another wake up moment. Oh my god! How could I gain almost 50 pounds back. Did I not feel happy with all of that weight gone? Did I not realize how much work I put in to take off over a hundred pounds? The answer was yes, I did know all of this but old habits die hard and apparently I did not make sure mine were dead before I buried them. Like zombies, they rose from the grave and tried to eat me! Damn zombies!
So hitting over 300 pounds again, I freaked out and got hardcore for awhile. I dropped back down to 272 pounds. I was on my way again, thank the lord! Unfortunately, I fell again. I gained weight again and I was 292 pounds. This yo-yo stuff is for the birds I tell you! So now I am back on track and focused on losing my weight. I have come to the realization that, yes I fell hard and I backslid. But if I look into the past, I see that before, I never kept weight off. I lost and then I gained it all back, plus more. I have not done that this time. I still have over 80 pounds off of me and this is an amazing accomplishment all on its own! I can do this. Even with the struggles and the falls. I spent years adding weight to my body and destroying its vitality day by day. I spent years so depressed that all I knew how to do was eat. So what if it takes another year or so to reach my goal. The point now is that I WILL reach my goal.
To be continued.....
